From Awareness to Action: How a Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel Can Transform Your Marriage
- Sam Fraser
- Aug 2
- 3 min read
Written by Sam Fraser
Do you feel something is missing in your marriage but can’t pinpoint it?
Many women come to me for relationship coaching for women because they feel disconnected from their partner but can’t explain exactly why.
You might be wondering:
Why has intimacy faded?
Why do we keep having the same disagreements?
Why do I feel like the balance in our relationship is off?
That’s where my Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel comes in. A powerful relationship self‑assessment tool I use in my SPARKi framework to help you gain clarity and take action.
This month’s SPARKi theme is Embrace Change, and change always begins with understanding where you are right now.
What Is the Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel?
The Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel is a simple but effective relationship self‑assessment tool that maps out your current strengths and challenges.
Instead of vague feelings like “We’re not as close as we used to be”, it gives you a visual snapshot showing:
The areas where you’re strongest
The areas that need attention
Patterns that may be affecting intimacy, trust, and communication.
The 8 Categories We Explore in Coaching
When we create your wheel during a marriage coaching consultation, we explore these eight key relationship areas:
Communication style: How you and your partner talk and listen to each other.
Managing emotions: How you handle conflict, frustration, and stress together.
Confidence in intimacy: How comfortable you feel with emotional and physical closeness.
Balance & equality: Whether responsibilities and decisions feel fairly shared.
Self‑care & personal energy: How well you look after yourself to show up fully in your relationship.
Decision‑making & independence: How confident you are in making joint and personal decisions.
Boundaries: How clearly you set and respect personal limits.
Reliability & follow‑through: How much you and your partner can depend on each other.
Your Teaser Self‑Check Exercise
Here’s how to get a quick snapshot today:
For each category above, score yourself from 1 to 10 based on how satisfied you are.
Plot your scores on a simple circle diagram to create your own mini relationship and self‑behaviour wheel.
Notice where your highest and lowest scores fall.
Tip: This is only a starting point. In relationship coaching for women, the real transformation happens when we explore your scores together, uncover the why, and create a personalised plan to address the areas that matter most to you.
Why SPARKi Relationship Coaching Works
The SPARKi framework turns your wheel into a tailored action plan:
Strength – Build on what’s already working.
Purpose – Define your relationship vision.
Authenticity – Show up as your true self.
Resilience – Handle challenges without losing momentum.
Kindness – Bring compassion to yourself and your partner.
Integration – Make your changes stick in everyday life.
Why This Matters for Improving Your Marriage
Without a clear picture, it’s easy to repeat patterns that keep you feeling stuck. The Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel gives you the clarity to focus on the areas that will create the biggest shift, whether you want to improve intimacy in marriage, create more balance, or strengthen communication.
Book Your Free SPARKi Marriage Coaching Consultation
You can try the teaser version today, but the real value comes from a guided session where we create your full personalised wheel and translate it into a practical, step‑by‑step action plan.
In your free 30‑minute SPARKi marriage coaching consultation, we will:
Complete your personalised Relationship & Self‑Behaviour Wheel
Identify your strengths and growth areas
Create your first steps to a stronger, more connected marriage
You’ll leave with clarity, confidence, and a clear action plan, whether or not you continue coaching with me.
📅 Book your free SPARKi Consultation today and take your first step towards a happier, more connected relationship.
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